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--February 22 2017--

Monday, January 27, 2014

A Puddle of Tears



Philippians 4:13 ESV
I can do all things through him who strengthens me.


I tell you, when you ask Father to give you a push He surly does!

Thank you to those of you who are praying for me in this area of obedience. I truly feel your prayers! Let me explain a bit.

Since I have been asked to run this House of Prayer and our churches prayer chain Father has really laid a load on me, something I am not use to at all. I love to pray and am very honoured to pray for anyone anytime and all of the time. What I am not comfortable with is a large group of people interactions. I am an one on one person and even then that can be really stretching me. I get emotionally and spiritually exhausted and need time alone in order to recuperate. If I can pull away from the group and just hover on the outside I usually do well but if I am the center of attention I get totally woozy and icky feeling. This was definitely a woozy and icky feeling! 

This past Friday I held a meeting for those on the prayer chain and from those who were there, they said I did a good job and we were able to get a bit of organization done. What I didn’t expect was the spiritual attack on me. After everyone left I felt so very drained. I turned up the worship music and fell in a heap on the floor and just wept. I needed to be in my Father’s presence and I needed Him to love me and fill me up. Soon, my husband came into where I was, rubbed my back gave me a gentle kiss on the head and prayed for me.

I am being stretched and it hurts!

I am so thankful for your prayers; if I wasn’t covered I would never have been able to hold that meeting. My insides were full of springs and my stomach was in a tumble yet when I prayed and spoke the words came out clearly and coherently. Even now, as I type, I am just weeping at the faithfulness of Father. Never in my wildest dreams did I believe I could do what I just did. I do admit, though, I needed the whole weekend to gain back strength and even yesterday after church when we meet with the youth and young adults, I had to sneak away to a spot by myself and just soak in Father’s presence.

Obedience is hard yet when we take that step of faith He is there to meet us.

I encourage you to take that step of obedience, whatever that may be, and trust Father will meet you and uphold you. 
He is Faithful!




Revelation 2:10 ESV
Do not fear what you are about to suffer. Behold, the devil is about to throw some of you into prison, that you may be tested, and for ten days you will have tribulation. Be faithful unto death, and I will give you the crown of life.



Blessings,
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Posted by child of God at 11:02 AM
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14 comments:

  1. Reformed rebelJanuary 27, 2014 at 7:04 PM

    Amazing post child of God. I know how you feel. For me, praying even one on one is so very hard. I will be praying for you because I know this is something that you can do, a way that our Father can really shine through you. He's totally got you!
    Blessings...Chelle

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    1. child of GodJanuary 27, 2014 at 8:30 PM

      Thanks Chelle. :)
      I was really bad with one on one prayer before but I realize that, and even this, is warfare. It is demonic oppression and I am so sensitive to it that it numbs me. Obedience to following God's Word is what will break this and a lot of prayer.
      Thanks hon for your prayers and reminding me Father has me!! Praise GOD!

      <><

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  2. Never ForsakenJanuary 28, 2014 at 6:02 AM

    I'm so glad I stopped by here this morning!
    I understand your exhaustion very well, as you know.
    How wonderful that you were able to have that time to just fall on the floor and be washed and renewed...It is a good thing and very needed. (sweet husband too :)
    Father always allows for our needs...He doesn't call us to go through hard things only to leave us empty and sick...No, He brings us through, allows us a rest and refreshes us anew!
    All things are working for the good HIS good intention and purpose and will...Next time you will know what to expect from yourself as well as from the Father...You know you will need those times to recharge...to visit Him in the garden alone...and He will always meet you there and restore your strength.
    Love you my faithful friend and sister in Christ...I am so proud of you! ~ Lisa

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    1. child of GodJanuary 28, 2014 at 9:31 AM

      Hi Lisa,
      Yes, you would really understand since you too love to be alone. Father has been really preparing me for this yet still it is so scary and exhausting.
      Thanks for your encouragement, prayers and love. I am so blessed!

      Lifting you up to our Father as you walk this path before you.
      <><

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    2. Never ForsakenJanuary 28, 2014 at 10:44 AM

      I'm continuing to pray for your new ministry...I am excited to see things happen through it! ;)

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    3. child of GodJanuary 28, 2014 at 1:41 PM

      Thank you Lisa you are a dear to pray for me when you are going through so much. Know that Father sees this and He will bless you.
      This is a really exciting ministry Father is leading and I am thrilled He wants me to be part of it.

      Blessings sister, thanks for your support.
      <><

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  3. TC AveyJanuary 28, 2014 at 11:08 AM

    I just prayed for you.
    Being a warrior for Christ comes at great personal sacrifice. It's hard bearing the burdens of others. But God will help you, as He already is.
    Isaiah 40:31 came to mind as I read your post.
    So did all the times Jesus secluded himself to spend time with God. Nothing can replace time with God.
    We can't pour out His love to others if we are not first poured into by His Spirit.

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    1. child of GodJanuary 28, 2014 at 1:48 PM

      Hi TC Avey,
      Thank you for praying for me and for sharing Isaiah 40:31! I love that verse so much that I bought a zip up hoodie with this on it.
      You sound like a veteran warrior who knows the burden well. Matthew 11:30 tells us that Jesus' yoke is easy and the burden is light and praise God this is so true!!!
      The sweet presence of God is the best feeling ever.

      Thank you for leaving a comment.
      Blessings,
      <><

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  4. Sola ScripturaJanuary 28, 2014 at 11:20 AM

    Thank you for this encouragement!

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    1. child of GodJanuary 28, 2014 at 1:48 PM

      Sola Scriptura,
      Thanks for visiting friend. :)
      <><

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  5. BrendaJanuary 29, 2014 at 2:15 AM

    Hi child of God,
    I would not worry too much. If God is in it then you will have a peace about it and be able to cope if He is not then you would soon know. I remember when I was in a church gathering and the pastor asked me if I would take the Sunday school. I went for a while but did not feel comfortable about it. I told the pastor I did not feel right about it an when I came back into the congregation I felt spiritual relief. Praying and prophesying was what I had been called to do there.
    God bless

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    1. child of GodJanuary 29, 2014 at 5:02 AM

      Hi Brenda,
      Father is all over this one! He is in it and directing it, I am only following His lead being His hands and feet.

      Thanks for sharing this bit of your story. Being sensitive to Holy Spirit is something people are squashing these days and calling it coincidence. Stepping outside of our gifting may not be too harmful to us but it can be very harmful to those on the receiving end. Good decision to give teaching Sunday school a try and then stepping back when Holy Spirit was not blessing you.

      We have a few positions in our church that are not filled and have been standing empty for over one year now and that is because our church does not want anyone stepping into those positions unless Holy Spirit directs. However, I do believe that there maybe a few people who are not obeying Father by ignoring His voice and leading to step up to bat.

      Blessings sister,
      <><

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  6. FloydJanuary 31, 2014 at 9:11 AM

    Yep. Your heart is breaking as our Father increases the size and content within. "With God all things are possible." I guess this points to that fact. Praying for you, sister.

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    1. child of GodJanuary 31, 2014 at 11:17 AM

      Thank you for your prayers Floyd. It is these prayers that are breaking down the spiritual warfare of fear of man that I have. I'm clinging onto "With God all things are possible." He can do it through me if I yield to Him.

      Blessings brother,
      <><

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